Need a little something for the stocking for the Mrs. or a New Year’s gift for that special, little lesbian you hope to get under the mistletoe? Below are my favorite small, and cheap, (in dollars, not sentiment) gifts for the holidays, or anytime really, for that gender-fluid honey in your life. Show her you know her by giving little gifts that acknowledge her womanly love of the word.
Zipper Pouch – $5.99
I found these cute little zipper bags at my local bookstore and snagged several for myself and my writer friends last year. They make great pencil bags, or make-up bags. They also double as clutch purses for the geeky, nerdy writer girl who needs a catch-all wallet that isn’t too-too femme.
Too chicken to get inked for eternity? For $5 Lithographs will send you a two-pack of stick-on temporary tattoos which feature literary quotes. These little treasures are sure to impress fellow literary ladies at book clubs, conferences and readings. My fave is “Resist Much; Obey Little,” from Walt Whitman. What can I say: I am a rebel child of the 70’s. “The Wizard of Oz” tattoo is sure to please any Dorothy.
Take a reading break while holiday shopping online. (You know you want to.) Clare Lydon is a very popular writer of lesbian romance stories in the UK. Her popularity is well-deserved (IMHO). Her writing is bubbly, light and engaging. This holiday season she is giving away her novella, “It had to Be You.” I downloaded the freebie and gobbled up the entire book in two hours without stopping for a restroom break. “It Had to Be You,” is a great, old-fashioned romance which starts with a May-December theme and then delights with a plot twist that leads to a second chance for two 54-year-old women who missed their chance at true love back in their college days. This novella is witty, sassy and wickedly funny. Five star fun for free. Thanks Clare!
Could this gift be any more lesbian? Cute, and handy to stash drugs, chew, paper clips or ink pen nibs.
If you’re married to a writer you likely see the bottoms of her stocking feet quite a bit. These practical, warm socks are prefect for typing fireside, and can be bought with the alternative message “Bring me a beer,” for earthy women who prefer to sip suds as they create.
The pen is mightier than the sword, and in my experience women lust after women who know how to use the English language as an aphrodisiac. Writing letters is, after all, how I met the babe of my dreams 20+ years ago. As she said to me decades ago, “You had me at the correct use of the semi-colon.”
Could there be a better way to spend a fiver in honor of your writer? Virginia Woolf, Toni Morrison and Margaret Atwood are such bad-ass writer babes, eh? “A word after a word after a word is power.” Right on Madge!
Got LGBTQ friends who love to party? Got sober friends who did rehab? Give them the gift of laughter. The Big Sugarbush (yep – I wrote it, shameless self-promoting hussie that I am) follows the intertwined love lives of ten high-achieving lesbians as they check into a Vermont rehab center and try to kick their addiction to drugs, alcohol and late night booty calls. Getting sober has never been so much fun. Available in ebook or print.
What every writer’s doormat ought to read. Okay, it costs a bit more than ten bucks, but it’s close enough, and too cute not to stuff into her gift bag. I’m sure she’ll love you for it. Just be prepared to see this sign nailed to her office door and aimed at you!
Cool, simple and inexpensive. Plus she can use these magnets to leave sappy love notes to you on your refrigerator door.
Writer gal can keep her ear rings or her cigars in this cute as a button vintage trinket box. Butch, femme or gender-fluid: this is a one size fits all gift for just a squeaker above twenty bucks.
Most writers are quiet creatures, lurking in dark corners plotting against the world (and sometimes their loved ones). And writers are wicked smart. In fact, IQ test–makers list writers as the smartest among all professionals, easily outstripping their better renumerated professional peers in medicine, law and technology. Date a woman writer: let the dangerous adventure story begin.
When you love your writer girl, but you aren’t quite ready to put a ring on it. Take that first lovey-dovey step toward going steady. Give her a matching initial necklace. If she wears it, consider yourself a contender. If not, cancel that U-Haul rental, OK?
Ana B Good is a lesbian writer, living in Vermont. Her debut rom-com novel, The Big Sugarbush, is available online in ebook formats and in print in bookstores and online.